When your child wants to meet his or her birth parents
April 6, 2017
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Although the adoption journey is filled with beautiful surprises it can also be quite uncertain at times. It’s natural for an adopted child to want to meet his or her biological parents. However, this will inevitably cause some fear that your child may want to live with the birth parent instead of you. It’s important you discuss your concerns regarding adoption and birth parents with a capable Aventura adoption lawyer before embarking on this journey. An attorney can help you stay focused on the things that matter the most to you and your child.

What to say?

It all depends on your child’s age and your preparedness. Remember emotions may kick in and you need to be able to control them otherwise you will end up saying things that hurt your child emotionally. Some adoptive parents discourage their children from meeting their biological parents and may bribe them or even threaten them when mentioning the subject. This is detrimental to the child’s emotional stability. Although it might be hard at the time, try being very positive and telling your child that everything will be okay. Perhaps it’s time to join an adoption support group in your area or seek the guidance of a professional counselor. It’s a safe place to vent your fears and allow others to shed some light on the subject. Chances are you will be less sensitive and more focused when talking to your child the next time around.

Meeting the birth parents before adoption

Some adoption agencies suggest adoptive parents meet their child’s biological parents before finalizing the adoption. This is especially true during open adoptions where adoptive parents are provided with more information about the child’s background. It helps establish realistic expectations before the child arrives home. In most cases, this experience can yield amazingly positive results. The adoptive parents, birth mother and social worker can all sit down and discuss the adoption and things that matter to the child. This step may help you avoid headaches in the future, help you feel more confident to explain your child where he or she came from, and why adoption was considered.

Why meeting or not meeting the birth parents?

Knowing the biological parents it’s important to both the adopted child and biological parents. It also brings reconciliation among all the parties involved. The child will understand why adoption was the best option and how fortunate he or she is to be welcomed into such amazing family. However, this may also affect the adopted child and birth parents in a negative way. Sometimes people are not prepared for such emotional events in their lives.

For example, children may develop feelings of inadequacy if they find out their biological parents had abandoned them due to their disability. In some specific cases, the adopted children seek to harm their birth parents because of the way they abandoned them. Also, biological parents may think they have a right to their child.

We understand adopting a child can be a difficult process. This is why Morrow Law Firm is with you every step of the way. With our knowledgeable support and guidance you will be able to resolve your adoption matter in a quicker and more effective way.